On setbacks…

You may have seen that I just learned to swim 2 weeks ago, after 40 years of being terrified of water. (dad/lake/near drowning).

I was moving right along, swimming more and more laps, until today. Today, swimming alone, I inhaled some water & was right back there. Three or four years old and drowning, almost forgotten by my stupid father & his drunk friends.

Today I flashed back to that & almost cried. So, gulping air and hyperventilating, I made it to the end of the lane and clung for dear life. It was the deep end, naturally. But I used Lamaze breathing until I calmed down.

And then I started swimming and made it the back to the other end of the pool.

I was done for the day, then, but I made it back to the end. I’m proud of me.

Swimming is a lot like writing books and having a publishing career. You can finally be brave enough to stick your head underwater…you can swim a lap & another & another …and then you can fumble and flounder and almost drown. But you can always flip over and FLOAT for a little while–swimming or writing… …catch your breath, make it to the end of your lane.
Finish the lap. Finish your book.

I was really, really scared today. But I did it.

And I’ve finally learned to be proud of what I accomplish, instead of beating myself up for the times I fail. So: I’m proud of me. I didn’t drown. I made it to the end of my lap.

And tomorrow? Tomorrow I’ll be right back at the pool.

2 Comments

  1. Denise K on June 28, 2017 at 3:58 pm

    Awesome Job!!! Like my mom always told me when I became frightened of doing something…”If it was easy, everyone would do it!” To this day, EVERY time I dive I still have that few seconds of terror before my brain engages and my heart restarts. You are amazing! It takes guts to overcome memory terrors. My biggest memory terror (still working on it) is rain, a bridge (with no railing), a drunk dad and a fast speed spin out in traffic. I call them (the memory terrors) Wile E Coyote, Super Genius Moments. (Ref. Road Runner Cartoons) LOL!

    • Alyssa Day on October 25, 2017 at 1:57 pm

      Thank you! and hugs to you!!

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