The Naked Truth About Guys, by columnist C.J. Murphy
Marriage and Herring, or Other Smelly Fish
When you bring up marriage (because it will always be you who brings it up), a Guy will say: “I’m just not ready to make that kind of commitment.”
In Human Speak, this means: “Are you OUT of your MIND? I’m living the free, happy, single life [NOTE: A Guy will think this even if he’s living in his mother’s basement], and the LAST thing I want is to tie myself down to a healthy, secure, monogamous relationship. Because at ANY TIME, a busload of hot Swedish bikini models might drive by and say, ‘Hey, YOU! The guy with the ring on his finger! We were going to take you on our Bus of Unrestrained Sexual Urges and oil you up like a sexy little herring of lust. But we see that you’re married. Too bad; your loss!”
(Except, maybe, they might say it in Swedish).
This kind of thinking is rampant in the typical Guy mind.
What “I’m just not ready to make that kind of commitment” does NOT mean includes the following:
- “If you make yourself over completely until you’re a carbon copy of me and pretend to enjoy sports, keg parties, and Hooters, I’ll marry you,” OR
- “If you give up your friends, your hobbies, and your life to sit around by the phone waiting for me to call, I’ll marry you,” OR
- “If you make me jealous by dating my best friend, I’ll marry you.”
So, STOP THE MADNESS!! Reclaim your self-esteem. If your Guy says he’s not the marrying kind, believe him. Then kick him to the curb. Remember that old saying about fish in the sea? (And we’re not talking oily herring . . .)
Until next time, remember: Guys! Can’t live with ‘em, can’t attack them with your new corkscrew.